It's Snot You, It's Me

Autumn is not a baby. She is a full-fledged toddler, and I am OK with that. I haven't really cried over each and every milestone as she has hit them. Don't get me wrong, I have been excited each time she has learned a new skill or said a new word, but I haven't felt that bittersweet twinge that my baby is growing up. I have just been so excited to watch her grow, excited to watch her learn.

For the past few days Autumn has been fighting a bad cold. She has been running a very high fever and is extremely congested. Like most toddlers, Autumn gets very clingy when she isn't feeling well. She wants nothing but to be coddled and rocked, the complete opposite of my usual bouncy, talkative two year old. For the past few days, my girl, who does not want to hold my hand in the grocery store or have me help her hold a glass of water  has needed her Mama. And this Mama has gotten very used to being needed.

This afternoon Autumn was laying on the couch watching her favorite cartoon when she asked me for some juice. As I was walking towards her, juice in hand, she sneezed. Now, as you can imagine, with a nose that has been running like a faucet, this was not a normal sneeze. This was a snot explosion. So I reached for the trusty Kleenex sitting on the end table to wipe Autumn's nose, when I saw that she had a Kleenex next to her and had already picked it up and was wiping her own nose.

Now, for a Mama who has not really felt bittersweet watching my daughter grow, this stopped me dead in my tracks. She had wiped her own nose. She did not need me to wipe her nose for her, she had just done it herself. I had watched my daughter roll over, crawl, stand, walk, talk, learn numbers and colors, but for some reason the simple act of wiping snot off of her face nearly brought me to tears.

Maybe it is the fact that Autumn's second birthday is in about two weeks that has me so off kilter, but I have just spent the last few days feeling like Autumn has needed me for everything to now feeling like my baby is gone and has been replaced with a little person who is perfectly capable of wiping her own nose.

This post has been shared at Momma Made It Look Easy