Love At First Sight

My love for Steve was not instantaneous. Like many, we had a friendship that grew into a relationship. It was not what I would consider to be "love at first sight" - maybe more "like at first sight."

Actual "love at first sight" is something I have experienced with only one guy. One little red headed, blue eyed boy. My Nate.

Before Nate was born, I remember wondering how I was ever going to love another person as much as I love Autumn. How could my heart possibly make enough room? Well, all of my concerns were quieted in that moment that Nate was placed into my arms. I felt the same rush of all encompassing immediate love that I had felt for Autumn on the day she was born. Watching them together - playing, laughing - I swear there are moments I think my heart is going to explode.

Nate is on the verge of being 18 months old. One of my favorite things about this stage is getting to watch as his personality starts to form. He is my sensitive one. He is my cuddler. He is adventurous and fearless. Unless he is eating or sleeping, he doesn't stop moving.

Speaking of eating, Nate has a bit of a reputation around these parts. In 18 months we have found only one food that he doesn't like - green beans. The kid will eat ANYTHING you put in front of him. He will eat, and eat, and eat - and just when you think his little Buddah Belly can't fit anything else - he will eat some more. This is in stark contrast to his sister who survived on only Fruit Loops the second year of her life.

Nate has added several words to his ever growing vocabulary. Currently he says Daddddyyyyy, Mama, Doggggyyyy, this, that, bye-bye, get, go, bird, car and cookie. He loves music and immediately starts to clap his hands and "dance" when he hears it. Most car rides consist of Autumn singing Disney songs at the top of her lungs while Nate claps and sways back and fourth in his car seat.

The only thing that Nate might love more than food is his pacifier. This attachment was foreign to me because Autumn refused to take a pacifier. She would actually throw it back at us if we attempted to give it to her. Nate is the complete opposite and has one everywhere he goes. Steve and I were "those parents" who swore that upon Nate reaching 12 months of age the pacifier would make it's exit - well, here we are- 6 months past our deadline and I don't see Nate's paci going anywhere anytime soon.

Nate has officially made the transition from bottles to sippy cups and today he took his first car ride strapped into his "big boy" car seat. He is in that limbo - no longer a baby but not quite a full fledged toddler - and my heart is forever in limbo. Excited for what's ahead and trying to hold on to what we're leaving behind.